A Roman Slave Did It...

The huge number of people claiming to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's orphan child could be seen as quite heart warming. Here we have a poor little waif orphaned at a tender age. Luckily they shouldn't be parentless for too long as a queue is growing of men claiming to be the father. A cynic might think that the $240mn fortune this child inherits is a motivation, I prefer to think of it as a reaffirmation of the goodness of modern mankind. Could you stand by and let some unfortunate child go through life with no parents? Not even somebody as shallow as Madonna could do this, she even adopted a child BEFORE it was an orphan.
The line of people saying "I'm the father" reminds me of the scene in Spartacus where a whole hillside of slaves defiantly stood up and said "I'm Spartacus". The only difference being that their reward was substantially less than $240mn.
I urge you all to say "I'm the father".