Kings

The Fruits of My Research - Kings

Forms of government go in and out of fashion, just like clothes and music. Democracy is now a little bit passé, Islamic Fundamentalism is the new black and Monarchy is just “so last century”. Despite this, there are many kings left in the world today. These rulers are a dying breed and represent a link with a long and illustrious line with many well-known names.
For example, the Bourbon Kings ruled France and Spain for hundreds of years. They got their name after their well-publicised addictions to chocolate biscuits and American whiskey. The most famous Bourbon King was Louis XVI of France who had consumed so much whiskey that he was unable to make rational decisions. His decree that all the prisoners in the Bastille should be freed and that his wife’s idea of force-feeding peasants on cake should become law aroused such intense hostility that the population ordered Madame Guillotine to publicly execute him. Alcohol and government clearly do not mix which is why famous leaders like Winston Churchill and George W. Bush never touched the stuff. Only a cad and a bounder would mention Bill Clinton and a hard “liquor” at this point, but I wouldn’t stoop to that level.
King Richard III of England was known as the Lion King. Instead of ruling the country with a firm but fair hand, he spent most of his reign watching performances of a mummers play called “Ye Lione Kynge”. This story of a young lion cub growing up in Africa made such an impact on him that he ordered it to be performed 6 times a day for eternity. In recent years Elton John has helped revive this tradition in many homes with young children.
After many revolutions across Europe a number of kings have become homeless. These “Gipsy Kings” lead a nomadic life seeking money and shelter. The most famous of their number is King Bedouin of Belgium. In 1989 a group of them got together to record “Volare” which became a massive hit across Europe and the USA. In doing so they became the first former heads of state ever to top the Billboard charts, Elvis Presley not being a real king.