Growing up in 1970s Yorkshire, there were some career choices that just weren't available to us. Our teachers never offered us a choice of "Extreme Cake maker".
It was either British Steel or farming and that was that. Youngsters today, they don't know they're born.
The Police Chaplain was talking to us at the weekend. He was saying how he was washing the mugs up at the station when one of the new young Constables came in.
"Why are you washing up, Padre? It's not your job" the officer said. "My guv'nor used to wash people's feet, so this is not too bad" the Chaplain replied. "Who's your Guv'nor then?" asked the fresh faced youth.
I challenged the goalkeeper for a looping high ball into the area. He made a phenomenal leap and caught it way up in the air. "You leapt like a salmon there,buddy" I said. "You wot? Like a salmon? That's a funny thing to say. Fish don't jump" came the reply from the confused netminder.
